Time Should Be Measured By Experience.

It's summer! Again! Yikes....

I have moved every summer since I was thirteen years old. At the ripe age of 26 I have moved 13 times. The choice to move has been my own since I was 18, and in the last few years I have sworn strict fidelity to each new location fully intending to make it a home and not a winter layover...only to break my vows that next summer and move on. There never seems to be a “great” reason for moving, as I'm sure normal non nomadic people have to have to make such a drastic change. Job, school, friends, connections, moving expenses be damned! Summer means one thing, and one thing only.... “IT'S TIME TO MOVE”.

Last summer (2009) I thought I had it licked! Stayed put through June. July started off wonderfully stable, but then around the 20th I heard the rumblings of “Move on” coming from the walls. My older sister said she wanted my grandmother to come live with her, which left us with a huge house we didn't need and the freedom to go and do what we wanted to! The energy and excitement was incredible! On July 28th we gave notice and had a month to sort, store, sell and give way our “things”.

Now, I, we (my younger sister and I) had planned on staying in our wonderfully huge country home for at least a few years. We had resisted our mom, our other sisters and our extended family urging us to move (to be closer to them). So we unpacked EVERYTHING! We had moved in with 2, 26 foot uhuals, and 3 horse trailer loads. This move was going to be.....CHALLENGING! We sold all of our furniture except our beds. Ended up with just one 10x25 foot storage unit, and felt quite accomplished since it we received very little help.

Well my older sister decided that my grandmother was “too much for her” not realizing the extent of care she required since her 2 strokes that April. So in September we found ourselves with out a house or jobs and with an 86 year old women who depended on us for “everything”. Ugggg!! The Older Sister conceded to keeping my grandma for the winter as long as we stayed close enough to take care of her. So we spent an uncomfortable 5 months at my older sisters house (sleeping in the driveway in our van, and later in her garage which had a wood furnace) working on finding housing and staying a float financially.

Housing that meets our criteria is not so easy to find.
1)Dog friendly
2)No steps
3)One level
4)Gas or electric heat only
5)Must be willing to rent to a 26 & 22 year old who have wonderful renting references but a crummy history in “staying put” for more then a year. .


Simply put, we could not find anything this time. Had to resort to asking my mom to help us out with a stable renting history. It did the trick. We found a place the end of January. We have a lovely little 4 bedroom house with a huge backyard in a very dog friendly neighborhood. There is just one thing I didn't count on.

My mom is in very poor health, dealing with CHF and RA so when she suggested moving in with us (she cosigned the lease) how could I say....anything but “would love to have you mom.”?

So I moved last summer to enjoy a bit of freedom I figured I was entitled to by right of my age, and what I received was a new roomy! My mom. Perhaps I've broken the cycle of moving every summer though? As if we move from here, it surely will not be until next summer.

Now, in this story there are quite a few areas where my weight and even my younger sisters weight really hindered us and complicated our situation. Some are pretty comical...some or not. I don't want to bog those stories down with this huge “where have I been” explanation, so I will post them separately over the next week.

Thank you to everyone who has not quit following me! I really appreciate it. Talk to ya'll soon.

Is this what Normal feels like?

In the month of May, I lost 18 pounds without trying to. Not much, if you take in how much I weigh, but it's still a pretty nifty accomplishment (is something an accomplishment if you weren't trying to accomplish it to begin with?), considering I have never in my 25 years lost weight without the aid of a diet.

I think there were 2 major factors behind the loss. First I went to the doctor and addressed the issue of major depression. I got a prescription and as my depression has gradually changed...so has my fixation on food. I'm not out of the woods yet where either are concerned, but I'm on the right path now.

On the same day I went to the doctor, I went shopping. Between the beginning of this blog and then, I had climbed up to 468 pounds! My shopping trip was inspired that day and I bought fruits, vegetables, lunch meat, bread, low cal mayo and condensed soup. I lived on that for 2 weeks without much thought or cravings for junk food.

The third week was food chaos with fast food, candy and a lot of pop. Didn't gain anything back though.

This last week, I almost completely stopped eating. Not because I was trying to...but because the compulsion was gone. I always thought those who boasted about "forgetting to eat" were liars and particularly annoying. But...when the fixation and compulsion are gone...it is quite easy to "forget" to eat. Huh...who would have thunk?!

I've started to wonder..."Is this what normal is?"

I can't remember a time in my life when I was not looking forward to the next meal or time I could eat. So this must be what most normal people experience huh? Only thinking about food when they get hungry? It is a very freeing feeling.

I hope things continue like this:)